Recent Review: Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (Released ? 1984)

“Things get bad before they get better…” George Lucas on Temple of Doom

So I bought ‘Temple of Doom’ while it was in the HMV sale, (As well as ‘Raiders of the Lost Ark’ for £2.70!), and watching it for the first time in at least 9 years has left me eager to put down some thoughts. Last summer ‘Kingdom of the Crystal Skull’ left most of my friends with a very foul taste, with which they proceeded to spew venom about how awful it all was, sullying the good name ‘Indiana Jones’. At the time I professed that it was “at least better than ‘Temple of Doom’”, but was too unfamiliar with the film to make a real comparison. Now I’ve finally seen TOD again I can safely say: I was so right. For all the flaws of KOTCS, TOD has it outmatched. Annoying sidekicks, obscure McGuffins, nonsensical exposition. Both have ‘em, but TOD’s got ‘em worse. When you've heard the Wilhelm Scream twice in the first twelve minuites, you know what kind of film you're in for. Humour comes in thick, disturbing dollops rather than the natural spread in ‘Raiders’, and it’s largely the fault of Indy’s new sidekicks. It honestly feels as if someone behind the scenes in constantly attempting to sabotage the picture. The philosophy seems to be: If the audience is starting to become enthralled by Ford’s natural charisma, we better cut to tag-along singer Willie screaming about something stupid or orphan Chinese kid Short Round laughing at an elephant’s antics. Short Round could have been annoying enough all by himself, but in context his scenes are relief from the constant whining, fainting and general pathetic-ness that follows Willie.

The film’s major redeeming feature is the thrilling mine cart getaway near its climax; an amazing mixture of stop motion, blue screen and full scale set work. This scene is usually remembered while the rest of this poor film is forgotten. In a sense I’m glad that good work has been remembered, but it’s a shame such poor work is held up too. So who is the saboteur? Spielberg is clearly not invested like he was in ROTLA, a fact he’s admitted in interviews, often giving “credit” solely to George Lucas. I feel whoever caused the drop-off in quality, this is the reason. Lucas was unleashed without anyone to stop him destroying his own work (See: The Star Wars prequels for further evidence), and we end up here. The ending of the film is especially nonsensical. Why does life return to the village before the magic stone? Why does Indy return before the kids who were released quite a while before? How DID life return so quickly, even so-far as to make the poor villager’s wardrobes more colourful? What, beyond poon-tang, does Indy get from the relationship with the aggravating and incompetent Willie? At the very least, KOTCS has less of these problems, even if it lacks a sequence as memorable as the mine carts. Ultimately this is one Indy film I could live without.

***

(UK Release: ?)